Just first a disclaimer, this is my experience. All experiences are different. Also I do not blame my doctor for lack of information on PP period and PP hormones, and I never told my doctor how I was feeling. I think the best information can come from other moms, just sharing our own experiences.

My first OB visit after discovering I was pregnant was such an amazing experience. After the examination my doctor talked to me and my husband for about an hour about pregnancy and the baby. I also followed along with a few apps throughout my pregnancy that broke down the development of the baby week by week! Comparing your baby to a fruit is weird but I kind of liked it.

Sooo why don’t we talk about the postpartum period, after the baby. It’s so easy to get caught up on decorating and preparing for your little blessing. My advice would be to make time to understand your body is going through changes and it doesn’t stop at delivery. Prepare for the recovery phase and have a good support system.

In general recovery was a little more difficult than I thought. I knew physically there would be healing but never considered the mental healing process.

Being pregnant everyone is so concerned about you and how you feel. I loved my friends always saying; “How’s little momma?”, it just felt so kind! After birth most of that goes to the baby, “How is Noah doing”, How is HE sleeping?” Which is all great but rarely anyone asked how I was doing and if they did I don’t think I ever gave an honest answer.

I felt so guilty to feel sad when I had such a blessing to be thankful for.

After giving birth and getting my discharge paperwork I felt so overwhelmed. All I could think about was how and what can I do for my baby. I did not ask any questions about my healing process and definitely nothing about mental health. The information in my packet had to do with bleeding(iron deficiency), tearing :o, breastfeeding and follow up in 6 weeks. For reference I am a RN and by no means have any specialty knowledge in Labor and Delivery. (Truth is that was my least favorite course in nursing school).

Anyways, during pregnancy your body makes an increased amount of estrogen and progesterone. After delivery your hormones DROP. This hormone drop contributes to mood swings, sadness, anxiety, and irritability which all can get better within a few weeks. Unless you experience these symptoms deeper and for a prolonged period of time (postpartum depression or PP anxiety) make sure you talk to your doctor!

I remember my 6 week follow up, where I was greeted by:

“What birth control do you want”.

I remember reading the questionnaire at that visit, asking how often do you feel sad or overwhelmed. I did not think I felt “bad enough” to ask for help. I could get through it, I could preserver. This went on for over 4 months…

Unfortunately I experienced extremely painful headaches; possibly from hormone changes, lack of sleep, or stress. And Oh man did I smell! Apparently stinky armpits is your body helping the baby find your breast? not sure about that. I remember waking up with the baby and being drenched in sweat where I had to change my clothes multiple times a night. That was unexpected and gross.

This was the big one for me. Loving your child so much that you don’t have the energy or time for yourself. All my energy went to my son. Oh and definitely did not give my spouse attention either. I would constantly want to do everything and anything for my son. We don’t have family near us, but plenty of friends offered to come help out or watch the baby so I could sleep, but I never accepted any of their offers. IT IS OK TO ACCEPT HELP. Trust me people want to play with a baby.

Asking for help doesn’t make you weak. Actually quite the opposite. Even with my husband I felt the need to always change, feed and comfort my baby. Not sure why I did that to myself but more than likely out of pure love. My baby was cared for so well but I was not caring for myself.

CRYING, wow I would cry a lot! Most of the time for no reason, possible lack of sleep but more than likely it was from my hormonal roller coaster.

I would tell my husband Im not the old Amber and I don’t think she will ever be back. After becoming a mom my connection grew with my son but I seemed to lose the connection with myself. It is hard to explain.

And I am just realizing after 4 months; It is completely OK to love your baby while simultaneously feeling; overwhelmed or anxious. No matter what you go through recovering takes time. Healing takes time. Keep the faith things will change or get better! Also probably easier to tell people about how your feeling rather than hide your emotions. Today I am great full for this sense of peace God has given me.

Here is just what I think could potentially help you out during the postpartum period:

• Talk to someone, anyone. It is ok to ask for help or just in general tell people how you feel.
• Surround your self with other moms. Although you feel as if you have no spare time, make some time. Even if its online, join a mom group. A huge help for me was someone validating how I feel. Knowing that this is “normal”
• Physical activity. Wow this has always been a huge help for me in times of hard feelings. I did postpartum barre classes online and that helped me a lot; mentally and physically.
• Maximize sleep, when you can. Its ok to have a messy home or a list of chores, one thing at a time.
• Be patient and gentle with yourself, this is temporary and takes time to heal.
• Now that you know becoming a mom or in general being a mom takes a lot of mental work too, be a great friend to other woman ♥️

Thank you again for reading my blog!